Is Sleep Training My Only Option?

When parents start looking for solutions to their baby’s sleep challenges, they’re often met with one dominant message: sleep training is the only way. Whether it’s the cry-it-out method, Ferberizing, or gentler “no-cry” approaches, the common theme is teaching babies to sleep independently by limiting parental involvement. But what if that approach doesn’t feel right for you? What if your instincts tell you there must be another way?

The good news? Sleep training is not your only option.

What Is Sleep Training?

Sleep training is a broad term that refers to methods designed to help babies sleep longer stretches at night by teaching them to fall asleep independently. This often involves some level of parental withdrawal, whether it’s leaving a baby to cry until they fall asleep (cry-it-out) or gradually reducing parental presence (Ferber method, chair method). Even so-called “gentle” sleep training methods work by limiting a baby’s ability to seek comfort in the way they naturally would.

The core assumption behind sleep training is that babies need to learn to self-soothe and sleep through the night on their own. However, this perspective doesn’t align with what we know about attachment, infant development, and sleep science.

Why Sleep Training Isn’t the Only Answer

The idea that babies must be trained to sleep is rooted in modern sleep expectations, not biology. Babies are born wired for connection, and their sleep is designed to be responsive to their caregivers. Night waking is normal, and many cultures around the world support babies through sleep in ways that don’t involve training them to be independent before they’re ready.

Parents often feel pressure to sleep train because they believe it’s the only way to get better sleep. But sleep doesn’t have to come at the cost of separation, and you don’t have to go against your instincts to find rest.

My Approach: An Attachment-Based Alternative

At Rooted in Sleep, I help families improve sleep without using any form of sleep training. My approach is based on attachment theory, sleep science, and a deep respect for each child’s unique needs. Instead of teaching a baby to sleep independently through separation, I guide parents to create a sleep environment that supports connection, regulation, and gradual developmental shifts.

Here’s what that looks like in practice:

Meeting your child where they are – Whether they need nursing, rocking, or snuggles to sleep, we work with what’s natural and sustainable for your family.

Understanding sleep development – Sleep is not linear, and developmental progressions, transitions, and changes are normal. We focus on long-term sleep health, not quick fixes.

Honoring the parent-child bond – Babies sleep best when they feel safe, and responding to their needs strengthens their ability to sleep well over time.

Supporting changes gently – If you’re ready to make changes, we work on gradual shifts that feel good for both you and your child—without forcing independence before they’re ready.

The Bottom Line

You don’t have to choose between good sleep and responding to your baby. Sleep training may be one path, but it’s not the only one. If sleep training doesn’t align with your parenting values, there is another way—one that honors your instincts, your connection with your baby, and the natural rhythms of sleep.

If you’re looking for a sleep approach that prioritizes attachment and responsiveness, I’d love to support you. You don’t have to sleep train to get more rest—let’s work together to find a solution that feels right for your family.